the vocabulary of hate

”The first thing we have to do is change hearts,” Betancourt told McClatchy in an exclusive interview. “We have to change the vocabulary of hate. When I dreamed of being free, I told myself that I could not engage in hate or rancor.”

”It’s a neurotic world, and there are lots of conflicts,” she said. “There’s a food crisis and an energy crisis. People are very anxious about this. We need to reflect on how we behave.”

”The guerrillas are our enemy,” Betancourt said in the interview. “But we shouldn’t insult them. We should show them how to seek a dignified exit through peaceful negotiations. If we don’t defeat them correctly, we will sow the seeds of hate for the future.”

- Ingrid Betancourt Pulecio

_____________________________

The short-term exacting of righteous, perhaps even justifiable vengence does not seem to be in Betancourt’s vocaulary. Hostage of FARC for over 2K days, she does not resort to ‘justice,’ in the sense of our version of justice. The justice of tried in court and punished. True to her polictal leanings, Ingrid shows a Christ-like view of reconciliation for the better good of all in her country.

Do we in America do the same? We are under the impression that might makes right. Perhaps we can learn from Ingrid in some instances. I know at a personal level, I need to rely less on justice-based retribution. This is a hard lesson to learn, to apply.

I would be curious as to how she would address Darfur and Zimbabwe. When force and genocide of masses of people are at stake. Then, of course, the US still does little in these areas to help other than a few policies a the state level, official statements at the national level and the protests of non profit organizations. One can only hope it will not be too little too late.

What is our current vocabulary of hate? What can we personally do to change that? Things to think about anyway.

Íngrid Betancourt Pulecio (born December 25, 1961) is a Colombian-French politician, former senator and anti-corruption activist. Betancourt was kidnapped by the Revolutionary Armed Forces of Colombia (FARC) on February 23, 2002, and rescued from captivity six and a half years later in Operation Jaque, along with 14 other hostages (three Americans and 11 Colombian policemen and soldiers), by Colombian security forces on July 2, 2008, who tricked the FARC into believing they were a leftist non-governmental organization. In all, she was held captive for 2,321 days after being taken while campaigning for the Colombian presidency as a Green.*

* Green Party of Colombia Option Center is a Colombian political party associated with the philosophies of the Green party, the “political middle”. The party advocates for having an ecological conscience, social justice, participative democracy, non violence resolutions, human sustainability and respect for diversity in order to improve the Colombian social, economic and political struggle and bring to and end the Colombian armed conflict.

Stanley and the Kingdom

I read a lot of quotes during the week. Often they, like portions of scripture, are something I chew on and think about. Sometimes they lead to new books or articles to read written by or about the author.

Today I am starting a portion of the blog where I share these with you and ask your opinion. Here is the quote I read today from Stanley Hauerwas.

[W]e must first experience the kingdom if we are even to know what kind of freedom and what kind of equality we should desire. Christian freedom lies in service, Christian equality is equality before God, and neither can be achieved through the coercive efforts of liberal idealists who would transform the world into their image.” Stanley Hauerwas, The Servant Community: Christian Social Ethics” in The Hauerwas Reader

I like the connection between Christian freedom and service. Often I think people look at service, missional or otherwise as binding and inhibiting in their lives. Perhaps it is because there is too much junk/noise from other commitments? I agree that forcing people or guilting them into service is not freedom-giving either. As Christians, we must always be watchful for how our opinions and actions are coercive or life-giving to others. We are not, after all, to transform the world to our own ideal image of the Kingdom, but God’s vision. And that, takes faithful living as well as scriptural study, something we could all use a little bit more of anyway.

What are your reactions to it?

a testimony of treading water, garages and creativity

A long time ago, I was bent on being famous in fiber art. Most of my extra time was for this purpose. Weekends, evenings after work deep into the night were spent creating art in my studio, honing my craft. My end game were competing in exhibits, selling work and looking towards when I would be a part of museum collections. I spent other time updating a website store, buying supplies, teaching and conversing with other fiber artists to extend my network online. I thought about ideas for creating pieces while I drove to my 9-5 job and sketched out ideas on scraps of paper during droning meetings. I dreamed of quilting patterns as I walked at night and as I did the laundry. And for my efforts, I reaped some benefits of all that energy. But in retrospect it was a lot like spiritually treading water.

A little over 5 years ago, several of the people I know began the journey of starting a new church in our town. We knew it would be lots of work and time commitment, but most of us felt the call to do so. But really, we had no idea what this would really be like. None of us had ever planted a church before. It was about half way through this time that I realized that God really wasn’t in my life that much. I had put God in the garage so to speak. God was still accessible, but truly not part of my daily living space. For most of my life, I gave God little thought outside of any ‘church activity’ such as worship, church events and the like. My life was God or other, not both.

Convenient

Compartmentalized

Safe

But as my service to planting this church increased, I realized this view would have to give way to something else.

Our God is a wild God, and cannot be tamed. God cannot be defined, categorized or controlled. God is God and we are not, no matter how much we try to lord over our lives. I began to understand this as I learned to practice the presence of God, to read the scripture more and wrestle with it, to learn to talk to God anytime. Often my talks or prayers were not the calm, eyes closed version of contemplative prayer. Indeed, I raged and lamented to God with my eyes wide open, openly yelling in protest and anger. But through this God let me rail and wriggle but kept whispering what had to be done next. Then in slow AND in great leaps. . . things starting shifting.

Unnecessary commitments dropped. I spent my time, my energy in different directions, for different reasons. I began to realize that discipleship was more than going to church on Sundays. Discipleship was a mix of joy and sacrifice, sometimes pleasant and often unpleasant and confusing, challenging my perception of the word Christian. This was not the bill of goods my born-again colleagues touted in college. There some tried to convince me that being saved for heaven was within my grasp if I just said a certain paragraph of word and I was ‘in.’ It seemed to good to be true, and now I know it isn’t that easy. This was not what I understood from my UMC roots. This did not fit any of my experiences in various churches and denominations as we traipsed across the country during my husband’s Navy years. God was in my face all the time. God was making me look into the mirror or myself and there when I cringed at what I saw.

For some reason I never put it all together until recently. I am a firm believer that there are many time lines in spiritual growth (not everyone is at the same place at the same time). God uses all in the time that is needed based on who we are. Indeed, I am often more like doubting Thomas than I care to admit. Therefore, I must put myself in the spiritual late bloomer category, giving new meaning to the phrase, “Great Awakening”. I learned that instead of the easy road, discipleship will require much more than just some words, it requires action, a lot of tripping on bumpy roads and several roller coaster rides. It requires constant challenge and transformation. The journey is messy, gritty, and unpredictable. It requires me to be more foolish and less cool. It shows me my pride and humbles me in the same instance. The more I listen to God whispers the less controlled and contained my life becomes. Yeah, God does drive me crazy.

What I do now is so different than 5 years ago. And even in the past year, this has shifted to a more intense focus on areas of concern to God…poverty, justice of the oppressed and mercy. This is so different than me from the past ‘famous artist’ stage where I had no time to commit to service projects or extra money for charities. I read a lot more as well. Bell, Claiborne, Willard, Zacharias, McLaren, Yancey, Wright, Lewis, and Miller have challenged my understanding of Christian discipleship, service and sacrifice. Now God lives not only in my house, but in other places I go . . . work, play, the kitchen, the bathroom, the backyard and places in between. As my good friend Ben Simpson said last week in his sermon, the spirit of God fills our cups and overflows into our lives and those around us. It seems that right now, I am always stepping in spilled water from my cup or someone else’s.  The scales are off my eyes and my lenses are focused on what needs to be done in God’s Kingdom.

I do still create, but with words, not fabrics. I used to write a lot before the artist thing. Now I am back at it, one of my original loves. If only a few people read my blogs, that’s okay. I will still write as it is truly how I process thoughts and this discipleship ride. I still have the studio, but it is for the most part, inactive and I’m not sorry for it. It seems as if others are more concerned about my lack of ‘art piece production’ than I am.

Instead my thoughts are on other things. Mostly Micah 6:8, Isaiah, Genesis 11 and 12, all of James and Jesus.

Now as I drive, do dishes or walk, my creativity focuses on ways to affect what is happening in Darfur, how the children in Tanzania and Uganda our family sponsors are doing, how to help fulfill the needs of the hungry and homeless, what is the best way to be a socially-conscious consumer, how can I pass this passion on to the youth of our church and my daughter and also trying to move towards being as green as possible. My time is also spent talking to God about these things and in prayer for others. For me, this is a better type of creativity. Onward.

My friends, what good is it to say you have faith, when you don’t do anything to show that you really do have faith? Can that kind of faith save you? If you know someone who doesn’t have any clothes or food, you shouldn’t just say, “I hope all goes well for you. I hope you will be warm and have plenty to eat.” What good is it to say this, unless you do something to help? Faith that doesn’t lead us to do good deeds is all alone and dead!

Suppose someone disagrees and says, “It is possible to have faith without doing kind deeds.”

I would answer, “Prove that you have faith without doing kind deeds, and I will prove that I have faith by doing them.” You surely believe there is only one God. That’s fine. Even demons believe this, and it makes them shake with fear.

Does some stupid person want proof that faith without deeds is useless? Well, our ancestor Abraham pleased God by putting his son Isaac on the altar to sacrifice him. Now you see how Abraham’s faith and deeds worked together. He proved that his faith was real by what he did. This is what the Scriptures mean by saying, “Abraham had faith in God, and God was pleased with him.” That’s how Abraham became God’s friend.

You can now see that we please God by what we do and not only by what we believe. For example, Rahab had been a prostitute. But she pleased God when she welcomed the spies and sent them home by another way. Anyone who doesn’t breathe is dead, and faith that doesn’t do anything is just as dead! James 2: 14-26

unplugged

It has been a few days, neigh, weeks since I’ve last blogged. I’ve been, as they say in the corporate world, “Out of Pocket.” More like unplugged. Unplugged makes me think of the MTV or House of Blues by the same name where artists play without electronics, making their sound more true, definitely different, and new kind of sound at the root of all their songs.

I spent 7 days in mission with 5 other adult leaders and 14 youth ages 12-18. Yes, this meant no TV, no movies or much internet except on our mobile devices late at night as we prepared to crash for a few hours. We received barely any news about the flooding Iowa, although we did experience a 4 hour delay in Indiana on I 70 where the road was closed. We heard days after the tornado hit Manhattan, KS. Basically, all the normal channels of noise, communication, or news were silenced. Unplugged from our daily existence.

For a week, we served in the Kingdom of God, interacting outside of our comfort zones, serving food and talking to homeless people in parks and in programs such as Sunday Breakfast and St. John’s Hospice. We spent time praying for those in need, cleaning up neighborhoods of weeds and trash, visiting with the wheelchair bound and elderly, learning about other cultures and neighborhoods. We learned, we did what was needed or asked of us in the areas we served, we then came home to ‘normal’ life.

But it doesn’t seem as normal anymore.

It really isn’t the same. Or rather, I am different.

For a week, I unplugged from work, from regular family responsibilities and focused on being a better disciple through service, through looking for Christ in everyone I met. And in that light, it was the most transformational week in mission I’ve ever spent.

Here are just a few people I had the privilege to meet.

Julio was a man in the recovery program at Sunday Breakfast. He and Chef John pretty much ran the kitchen area. Julio looked to be in his late thirties, a slim man of Hispanic descent with several visible tattoos on his neck and arms. After spending 3.5 hours sorting and organizing the kitchen pantry, we worshipped with all the homeless men there for a meal and program participants before serving them dinner at their tables. One homeless man testimony started with, “I thank God for this day.” With no instruments except for the beat kept by clapping hands, we sang hymns familiar and unfamiliar. I could feel the holy spirit in that room.

Julio echoed all statements made by our team with an, “Amen.” Julio radiated gratefulness and thankfulness. He was great with the kids who helped in the kitchen. He was great with those who served food to the homeless at tables and not through a line, the only place I’ve seen do this. My hope is to carry but a small portion of Julio’s example back into my life.

Abdul, a homeless Muslim, was also a cook in army in Germany when the Wall fell. He didn’t like Germany for all its rain and understands the relentless needs of feeding people three squares a day. He had no net of people to fall back on when he went homeless, and has been on the streets for 2 years. Abdul was remaking his sleeping bag bed when we approached him. He has a homemade quilt-tied sleeping bag with actual neck ties at the end so it could be rolled up and fastened. Our conversation went on for about 15 minutes with three youth and myself. The whole conversation was that of mutual interest in understanding who we were as people. He has plans to get back on his feet. My dream is to treat all people with kindness and respect like that conversation was with Abdul.

His name might have been Rudy…but his name has been known to change as Joetta from Hands for Hope said. He was in LOVE Park. One of many men hanging around in the park that evening, ,I couldn’t tell if he was homeless. He said he was now going to have a home as a caretaker of a building, living in an apartment on the premises he received through a pastor. There was no doubt in my mind that Rudy was full of the Holy Spirit as he witnessed to be for over 10 minutes. Rudy loved God more than any sack lunches we were offering. He was well fed on the Spirit. I should be so blessed.

I was introduced to Mary in the common area of a floor at the Simpson House
She was a small lady, light in build in a wheelchair. She talked of Fairmont Park, the largest park in the country and its issues with deer population. We bonded over our love for the movie, “The Quiet Man,” with John Wayne and Maureen O’Hara. She actually visited the location where they built the house Wayne and O’Hara lived in. She was there in the 50’s and has ties in that area. She reminisced about being called a Yank in Ireland.

Bruce was a tray processor and program participant at St. John’s Hospice and in the program. Jerry was a volunteer who also took trays. Both were very positive men whom I helped with trays, speaking kind words to all those who had eaten. We were happy to take the trays of homeless men who were finishing up their casserole, bread, fruit and water lunch. St. John’s served 335 people in 60 minutes in a room that seated only 64 at capacity. This is done every day with all donated foods from area churches and businesses. Efficient yet caring, the homeless have pitchers of water at their tables which are constantly refilled by server volunteers and people to take their trays as they finish. There was a die cut black and white painting called “Christ in the Bread Line” on one wall. It felt like we valued and served all people there with kindness, love and respect that Christ would expect from us.

Anna Kate was our team’s (team “Mad Croc”) Center for Student Mission host this week at mission sites. Anna was great, and also a kindred spirit of the left instead of right turn syndrome. I call it directionally challenged, of which I am a card-caring member. The good news is that we didn’t get lost in ‘bad’ neighborhoods. That was impossible! Anna’s sense of humor and ability to connect us with those at each site was a true blessing. It reminded me that building relationships between unlike people is a very important part of connecting with all of God’s people. Anna reminded me of this part of mission. All relationships are key where we serve. Always.

So slowly, I begin to ‘plug’ in again, but perhaps more selectively. Perhaps more deliberately. I will not engage in the same ways. I holding the true notes of this experience alive, pure, and unfettered by too much noise.

I waited patiently for the Lord; he turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand. He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see and fear and put their trust in the Lord. Blessed is the man who makes the Lord his trust, who does not look to the proud, to those who turn aside to false gods. Many, O Lord my God, are the wonders you have done. The things you planned for us no one can recount to you; were I to speak and tell of them, they would be too many to declare. Psalms 40:1-5

wastelands and desert people gardeners

Wasteland
1. Land that is desolate, barren, or ravaged.
2. A place, era, or aspect of life considered as lacking in spiritual, aesthetic, or other humanizing qualities; a vacuum: a cultural wasteland.

Wasteland is a word, when Googled, brings up 9,010,000 entries in .20 seconds. From bands to songs to poems to suburbs, our world is full of examples of wastelands. There is a song called Baba O’Reilly, often labeled, “Teenage Wasteland,” by the Who. Waste Land is one of T.S. Eliot’s most famous poems. It describes a journey of the human soul searching for redemption using a revolutionary style at that time. The Wasteland is a Celtic motif that ties the barrenness of a land with a curse that must be lifted by a hero. Wastelands shows up in Irish mythology and French Grail romances, and hints of it may be found in the Welsh stories as well. In the Bible, wastelands and deserts surround communities.

There are many stories in the Bible which show wastelands (deserts) as places of testing. The people of Israel wandered 40 years in the desert to learn faithfulness to God. John the Baptist was the voice calling from the desert of the coming Christ. Jesus was tested for 40 days in the desert by Satan to grasp the reigns of empire and spiritual power. Wastelands are testing and proving grounds.

I am being tested.

I am a desert dweller in just on the perimeter of a metro area in a community which is far from the intense life of inner city Kansas. In fact, many of the metro areas I’ve traveled through or lived in over my lifetime have a pattern of weaker inner cities (services, money, etc.) surrounded by more affluent neighborhoods and communities or ‘burbs with less visible poverty. Yes, all cities have poverty, but it seems to concentrate in the rundown areas of the inner city cores in a seemingly downward spiral of despair. The result of this isolation is a wasteland of comfort and affluence is a life cut off from people in the city, numbing my ability to recognize need, want, to the stories of the homeless. Where I live feeds the ‘us’ vs. ‘them’ paradigm through geographic separation, commuting between suburbs to work, and the lack of constant visual reminders of suffering.

This is what the Lord says: “For three sins of Judah, even for four, I will not turn back my wrath. Because they have rejected the law of the Lord and have not kept his decrees, because they have been led astray by false gods, the gods their ancestors followed, I will send fire upon Judah that will consume the fortresses of Jerusalem.” This is what the Lord says: “For three sins of Israel, even for four, I will not turn back my wrath. They sell the righteous for silver, and the needy for a pair of sandals. They trample on the heads of the poor as upon the dust of the ground and deny justice to the oppressed. Amos 2:4-7

I am being tested not to ignore the cry of the poor and oppressed. Tested to look past the Applebee’s and Chili’s, the Mall, the Wal-Marts and other strip mall, cookie cutter establishments that dot the suburbs to the cry of the poor and needy in the town where I live. Tested to look deeper into what I consume and ask, “Who made this? Were the people who made these garments treated with respect or in a sweatshop? Do I need another one of these things?” More and more I think, “Should it be this way?”  For the last question, the answer is a definite no. I do not have all the answers to these questions, but I keep searching and keep asking more questions. In the meantime, I look for more ways to love my neighbors, wherever they live.

Jesus did not think that only he sowed the Word of God. He was constantly sending people away, telling them also to sow the seed of the kingdom . . . a distracting, violent, and tempting world, keep sowing the seeds of love. Sow it everywhere, even when Herod cuts it down, and even when the world’s riches try to choke it.

Sowers must not become discouraged easily. The disciples were constantly butting up against Jesus’ thoughts about the way God’s reign comes on earth. ‘It will never work that way!’ you can hear the disciples thinking at almost every encounter. They thought the kingdom would come quickly like the apocalypse, as almost all revolutionaries from Marx to Guevara have insisted. But Jesus’ revolutionary patience claimed that another kingdom is coming—one that you can participate in but cannot build; a seed you can plant and water but cannot make grow. You can’t drag the kingdom of God into the world. But you can’t stop sowing the seeds either. Sow them everywhere. “Jesus for President,” (Claiborne and Haw) You can read more about this book here.

I leave you with these lyrics from the ‘80’s band Tears for Fears. The still ring true after their release in 1989, almost 20 years ago. Something to ponder as you ask your own questions and search for answers.

Seeds of Love

By Tears for Fears

High time we made a stand and shook up the views of the common man
And the lovetrain rides from coast to coast
D.j.s the man we love the most
Could you be, could you be squeaky clean
And smash any hope of democracry ?
As the headline says youre free to choose
Theres egg on your face and mud on your shoes
One of these days theyre gonna call it the blues

And anything is possible when youre sowing the seeds of love
Anything is possible – sowing the seeds of love

I spy tears in thier eyes
They look to the skies for some kind of divine intervention
Food goes to waste !
So nice to eat, so nice to taste
Politician grannie with your high ideals
Have you no idea how the majority feels ?
So without love and a promise land
Were fools to the rules of a goverment plan
Kick out the style ! bring back the jam !

Anything…
Sowing the seeds
The birds and the bees
My girlfriend and me in love

Feel the pain
Talk about it
If you’re a worried man – then shout about it
Open hearts – feel about it Open minds – think about it
Everyone – read about it Everyone – scream about it !
Everyone, Everyone – read about it, read about it
Read in the books in the crannies and the nooks there are books to read
(Chorus 0

(mr. england sowing the seeds of love)

Time to eat all your words
Swallow your pride
Open your eyes

High time we made a stand and shook up the views of the common man
And the love train rides from coast to coast
Every minute of every hour – I love a sunflower
And I believe in love power, love power, love power !!!

Sowing the seeds
An end to need
And the politics of greed
With love

first 10 and the kingdom

I subscribe to the David Crowder blog. This week, a blog asked this of me:

“Grab your preferred digital media player and push play in shuffle mode. Report here in the comments the first 10 tunes that pop up. Cheating is prohibited, as it would be in poor taste. This will decide whether you are a likable person or not, at least that’s what my friend Jack told me. When he said this, the part about being a likable person, I panicked, but it turned out he was kidding. Sort of. He did seem genuinely bothered by the two Bee Gees tunes though. I mean, 2 out of 10! That’s quite a lot of Bee Gees really, but what I’m trying to say is don’t cheat.”

So I grabbed my MP3 player, and, pressed “Shuffle”. Let me tell you the temptation to cheat is very hard to ignore. I mean, this list was supposed to define in 10 songs my musical profile, my musical TASTE. :-0 Here was mine.

* Stay (Wasting Time) by Dave Matthews Band / Live at Folsom Field
* Fireworks by Moby / 18
* Never Finish By Leigh Nash / Blue on Blue
* Go-Go Gadget Gospel by Gnarls Barkley / St. Elsewhere
* One Day by KT Tunstall / KT Tunstall’s Acoustic
* Breathe Me By Sia / Colour the Small One
* November by Duncan Sheik / Duncan Sheik
* One Chance by Modest Mouse / Good News for People Who Love Bad News
* #41 by Dave Matthews Band / Live at Radio City
* Gratitude by India Arie / Voyage to India
Hmmm. In general, my 10 songs were an eclectic collection, no Bee Gees or other interesting randomness on the list. No embarrassing “Frankie Goes to Hollywood” or other 80’s misfit reared its ugly head. Of course, what I’ve loaded or bought and put on my MP3 is not my entire musical taste history, I must confess. I’ve had my, er, moments of weakness. Stuff I really can’t bear to listen to anymore and I wouldn’t load onto my MP3 in the first place. My musical ear has progressed and changed throughout my life. Rarely do I delve into the past in music to ‘relive’ my wonder or high school existence. A few college tunes (from Springsteen, Joel, Madonna, Modern English or Soft Cell) occasionally peek out from behind the curtain of the past. But I digress.

What this seemingly meaningless exercise brought to light is our culture’s obsession with the perception of who we are based on what we consume. These perceptions come in many forms. The most obvious are how we dress, what we look like, who we hang out with, where we spend our free time, where we live, what our house looks like, what music we listen to, what kind of car we drive, and the list goes on and on. I do confess to utilizing one or other of these to assess, judge and react to people in particular situations. Which in retrospect is not so cool (that’s putting it rather mildly). This leads me to ask the question, “Does God care about my musical tastes? The label in my clothes? The coffee brand I drink? Of course I can’t speak for God, but based on what I understand about the Divine, I’d have to say. . .well, no.

The kingdom of God is not based on branding or human perception of acceptable practices. The kingdom of God is God’s vision, not ours. Jesus himself had the best ‘in’ on this vision. As followers of Jesus, we must emulate this vision through what we read in the Bible and practice in our lives. In the 4 translations of the Bible, here are more than 140 Kingdom references in the New Testament. Here are two to ponder:

“I’m baptizing you here in the river, turning your old life in for a kingdom life. The real action comes next: The main character in this drama – compared to him I’m a mere stagehand – will ignite the kingdom life within you, a fire within you, the Holy Spirit within you, changing you from the inside out. Matthew 3:11 The Message

“In a word, what I’m saying is, Grow up. You’re kingdom subjects. Now live like it. Live out your God-created identity. Live generously and graciously toward others, the way God lives toward you. –Matthew 5:48 The Message

Change from the inside out. Grow up. Listen to the fire that God puts in your heart. Live generously and graciously towards others they way God does for you. A little less surface, a little more grace. I’d say that’s part of the kingdom’s top ten, and those never go out of fashion.

For those who live according to the world are concerned with the things of the world, but those who live according to the kingdom of God with the things of the kingdom of God. The concern of the world is death, but the concern of the kingdom of God is life and peace. For the concern of the world is hostility toward God; it does not submit to the law of God, nor can it; and those who are of the world cannot please God. — Romans 8:5-9

Trying to live for the kingdom and not for what I consume,
Deana